Why Are There So Many Poor Managers & Supervisors?

... because their leader does not know what they are doing!

So often I find myself talking with, presenting to, emailing, or training leaders that have some of the following issues:

• Poor attitudes
• Afraid to speak up, especially in a group
• Sit in training with arms folded over chest
• Poor communications with everyone (even family members)
• Do not participate (group discussion, training exercises, etc.)
• Not happy to be anywhere

When I come across these managers my thought quickly runs to the question, WHO IS YOUR LEADER?

I am amazed that so-called leaders would select someone to manage people if they are struggling with any of these problems. Here is a quote from an excellent book, "First, Break all the Rules" published by the Gallup organization.

"A manager has got to remember that he is on a stage every day. His people are watching him. Everything he does, everything he says, and the way he says it, sends off clues to his employees. These clues affect performance. So never forget you are on that stage. Talented employees need great managers. They may join a company because of its charismatic leaders, its generous benefits, and its world-class training programs, but how long that employee stays and how productive he is while he is there is determined by his relationship with his immediate supervisor."

What these managers and supervisors need more than anything is a better leader themselves.

The Power of Encouragement

I am a walking, talking example that encouragement goes a lot farther then we think.

Growing up in a New Jersey State Troopers home my dad rarely, if ever, encouraged me. It was always clean up your room, you throw like a girl, what did I tell you about cutting the grass, shut the refrigerator door, can't you keep a job. Sometimes I hated going home.

My parents divorced when I was 13 and sometimes I would stay out late at night or over a friends house. When I was 19 I decided to join the USAF. Four years into my enlistment I volunteered to become a drill sergeant in boot camp.

You see, my background leans toward discouragement! JUST ASK MY KIDS!

Even knowing how it feels to receive discouragement I still struggle. I have had to work at this on a daily basis, heck, minute-by-minute is more like it. It is so easy to focus on what other people do wrong and what we do right. The very opposite needs to happen in order to build strong relationships.

We must admire the right choices other people make and expect ourselves to make better choices.

Fortunately I have a wife that can point my blind spots out. Oh do I have blind spots! How do I fight the natural tendency to be critical? Is it possible for someone with my background to change?

More to follow!

The Do's and Don'ts - Continued

Here are somethings that are sure to destroy relationships!

• Never say anything encouraging
• Always point out what they do wrong
• Fail to evaluate their performance (too uncomfortable) or never tell them how to improve
• Believe you have all the answers
• I have what I need to lead
• I don't need help
  

Be inconsistent in the things you say and do. Here are some critical ways to be INCONSISTENT

• Send mixed signals (nasty one day, nice as pie the next)
• Treat your friends (buddies) one way and everyone else another way
• Try to hide your character flaws
• Say one thing and do another
  

People are attracted to positive people and repelled by negativity. The number one reason people leave jobs is because the do not feel appreciated.

Do you want to know the best way to tell your people, BE PERFECT, what is wrong with you? Always point out what they do wrong.

Now go, tell someone you appreciate them, tell them how much you appreciate their ________. (fill in the blank)

The Do's and Don'ts of Workplace Relationships

Building strong workplace relationships is hard work. Unfortunately, one wrong move can send your hard work back many months if not years.

Here are some tips to help start the process:

• Learn what interests and hobbies they enjoy.
• Find out the dynamics of their family (married? children? where they live? etc.

Learn to ask questions:

• What are their goals in life?
• What do they hope to be doing in 5 years?
• What brings them the most enjoyment?
• What are their strengths? Weaknesses?

This may take some time but every second is worth it. Once built, a strong relationship can withstand the storms of adversity. Don't think the storms are far away and won't effect you, or you might plan on riding the storm out hoping for minimal damage.

That is not how it works. More to follow!

Typical Managers Today

There are many managers today that have no clue about building relationships. They are usually the ones with poor communication skills. Here is typical manager and how he deals with a problem.

Bill (picked this name out of a hat) manages 18 people. One of Bill's employees, Mary (another pick), comes to work late just about every other day. Everyone else is punctual and if ever, they are rarely late.

How does Bill deal with Mary? He writes a memo out to the entire team reminding them of the company policy regarding coming to work on time. Bill even cuts and pastes the policy into his memo and sends it out to the group.

Forget what Mary thinks about this memo. How do you think the rest feel when they receive this document? I am willing to bet they are going looking at the local want ads or visiting the online job placement sites.

We are very good at avoiding conflicts. Running towards the battle is not our natural reaction. Not having a good relationship with a person makes facing the problem even harder. If Bill had been developing a solid relationship with Mary he could have avoided upsetting everyone else.

Next post I will share some of the "does and don't s" of building lasting workplace relationships.